How I Gave Birth to the Universe Suddenly Went Viral
A true story about self-publishing, following your intuition, and standing your ground when success knocks your socks off.
It took me five years to write this book. I stopped dozens of times. The thoughts “Who am I to write a book?” and the familiar “No one is really waiting for this” kept playing tag in my mind. But deep down, I knew: “Don’t get distracted, this needs to go out into the world.” Plus, I regularly received loving nudges from my husband and friends to get back behind the keyboard.
The book is about creation, about letting it come into being, releasing control, and not overthinking. Naturally, the book made its way into the world in much the same way. My role was to stay present and trust my intuition.
Here’s the whole story:
The Title
The book has had many titles—from “Go With the F*cking Flow” to “Love in Lockdown”—all of which emerged during the writing process. They felt nice but never quite 100%. Then, during a transformative truffle experience, I literally felt the entire universe thunder through me.
We joked about it at home, and one day, Marcel commented on a post with the phrase, “Yes, or you’ll give birth to the universe,” referring to my magical journey. When I saw that, I immediately shouted, “That’s the title of the book!” I felt the potential, the power, the promise—everything unexplainable captured in those words. I knew 100% that was the one!
The Cover
Designing the cover was a challenge because I had a clear vision of what it should look like but no idea how to execute it. I needed someone who could see what I saw. My friend Ruben Lourens and I had worked together before—he’s a UX designer, and I was a product manager—but he had no book design experience. Still, I had a gut feeling he was the one, so I reached out.
What could have been a nightmare for a designer turned into a true creative process: two artists collaborating in freedom. I sketched, he expanded on it, and I got inspired by his work. Together, we arrived at the final design because we trusted each other and didn’t stop until it felt absolutely right.
Without him, this incredible cover wouldn’t exist!
Editing
I bravely requested quotes from professional editors and paid for sample chapters. All the work was good, but then I got a message from someone in my network, recommending Marlies, a linguist who occasionally did editing work. After speaking with her, she offered to edit a sample chapter.
As I read through her version, tears welled up in my eyes. She got it! I could feel her understanding through the changes and comments. I knew she had to be the one to edit my book.
Coincidentally, she had no other work during those months and was reflecting on her next steps, which allowed her to dedicate full attention to my book. And that dedication shows in every page.
To top it off, one of my beta readers, Linda, was so involved that she teamed up with Marlies to go through the first print again. That was weekend and late-night work, and no mistakes slipped through. Their meticulous attention was such a gift—it made the text flow perfectly.
The Printer
Initially, I worked with my old POD printer, which had been a cheap solution for my first book Bankruptcy, It Doesn’t Get Any Prettier. But a week before printing, I was waiting days for a response. Printing a full run requires investment and collaboration, but I felt that the person on the other end wasn’t as invested as I was.
I wanted a hands-on connection: to see the first print roll off the press, touch it, and make sure everything was perfect. So I started looking for a printer in the Netherlands that did everything in-house.
Google led me to a few options, and the first printer that called me back just felt right. As luck would have it, when Marcel and I visited Schultenprint, we discovered that one of their team members was an old acquaintance from Marcel’s time in the commandos. Of course! Nothing is a coincidence.
Looking back, I’m so glad I switched printers. When sales skyrocketed, I could quickly reprint—something that wouldn’t have been possible with the cheaper POD option.
Finance & the Crowd
I had only a few hundred euros in the bank and no idea how to pay for the first print run. So, I asked friends, family, and my network to buy the book in advance. All I had was a cover image, a vague title, and a back-cover blurb. Would people understand it?
The response was overwhelming! Within two or three days, I’d sold more than 300 books and could start the print run.
Handing Out Books Ourselves
When the first print run arrived, we needed to deliver the 300 books to the crowdfunders as quickly as possible. But with all the funds tied up in printing, we couldn’t afford the €1,200 it would cost to mail them. So, we decided: “We’ll distribute them ourselves. How hard can it be?”
We found an app to calculate the ideal route and set off at 7 a.m. The reality was far from ideal. Addresses were scattered all over the Netherlands, and we spent half the time in traffic. After 14 hours in the car, I was cramped, exhausted, and barely able to move.
But when your partner is a former Marine, “nothing is impossible” and “giving up is not an option.” We spent the next week driving around to all the addresses. It sparked the first wave of enthusiasm—people loved that we’d delivered the books ourselves, and they shared their excitement on social media.
Our Spot
Those following my journey know we didn’t have a permanent home at the time. We were renting cottages here and there. It was exhausting. We dreamed of finding a place to call our own and one day found a farm that ticked all the boxes—except for one: it was leasehold, a financial arrangement that didn’t feel right to us.
That night, I wrote a blog post about leasehold, land ownership, and our desire for a home. The power of social media did the rest. The same evening, I received a message from someone I’d connected with on LinkedIn years ago. He said, “I heard your heart’s cry and have a place for you.”
The next morning, we met him, and after hours of talking, we all knew: this was it. He was leaving for six months, maybe longer, and we could rent his beautiful farmhouse at an affordable rate.
Looking back, I sometimes think: what a gift! And not just because it’s a beautiful house. With all the books we’re packing now, this space has been essential. That little cottage couldn’t have handled this tsunami of books!
Be Careful What You Wish For…
It was early October when we moved into this house, and for the first time, I found an ideal balance between selling books every day, creating paintings, designing talismans, and writing blog posts. I also scheduled a monthly workshop; the large living room in the farmhouse was perfect for hosting dot art days. Every day, I delivered books to the Plus supermarket—on a really good day, there were up to ten orders. I was all smiles.
“Ten books a day, I think that’s a nice target,” I said cheerfully to my sweetheart one evening.
As a writer, of course, you dream of your book becoming a bestseller—devoured by everyone, appearing in the top ten of every bookstore.
But I knew from the start that wasn’t going to happen for me. I wasn’t going to sell my book through bookstores or that “big blue retailer.” I’d done that with my first book, and it made me miserable. It costs you at least 42% of your selling price (yes, that much!), leaving you with almost nothing and, worse, no direct connection with your readers. No idea who they are or how well your book is doing.
This time, I would do everything in-house.
And with ten books sold on good days, I was content. I loved wrapping the books, adding a nice note, and sending them off. Those same readers often booked a workshop or asked for a talisman design after reading the book. I was all smiles.
The Experiment That Set Everything Off
As I reflected, I tried to pinpoint when things really started to take off.
It was early November. I had made a post with the first reactions from readers and added a small ad budget to it. My sister had just shown me how to track exactly what one euro of advertising brought in via the online shop, so I could adjust the budget accordingly.
Gazing at the stats, I thought, “What would happen if I increased my budget tenfold this weekend? Will I get ten times the orders?”
I remember my love looking at me with concern, saying, “Are you sure? What if you lose all your money on Facebook?”
But I love to experiment—if you don’t try, you’ll never know.
And with that, I ignited the spark for a high-explosive event.
Two things happened simultaneously that weekend. First, I increased my budget, which made the post visible to many more people. Second, and more importantly, the early readers began commenting under the post, sharing how much they loved the book.
And then things really took off.
I had to reprint like crazy. By the time the new print run arrived, it was already sold out, and I had to reorder again. These were thrilling decisions—ordering print runs without knowing if sales would continue. Each print run got bigger, as did the investments. I reinvested everything I earned from the previous week.
The entrepreneur in me came alive!
No Compromise
Meanwhile, I had to ship all those orders. Of course, I wasn’t set up for that level of demand. And in all my wisdom, I had decided that the book should be sent as a gift: a letter, two beautiful art cards, a box with a sticker, all carefully wrapped. Very impractical. Friends who came to help often wondered aloud if all that effort was really necessary. Wouldn’t it be easier and cheaper to just put the book in a box and send it?
But I was resolute.
This was important!
Yes, it took a lot more time and money. Thousands of books meant printing thousands of letters, ordering thousands of cards, and folding boxes. But for me, it wasn’t about maximizing profits—I wanted everything to be just right. I wanted the story to be validated, and the energy to come through fully.
I don’t regret it for a second.
These choices mean that, even though readers sometimes have to wait a while for their book, the enthusiasm is immense when it arrives. The art I include touches people; it activates the energy, even before they dive into the story. This reinforces the intention behind the book—something I’ve felt so strongly for years—and gives it an extra boost. Naturally, all the social media posts about it have driven even more sales. Yes, dear readers, you are the engine behind this success!
The Other Side of the Coin
Of course, this kind of success isn’t always rosy. Sometimes I’m truly exhausted, working from morning until night.
And sometimes, things go wrong.
For example, the weekend before St. Nicholas, we had to pack more than a thousand books in just two days. Then the pallet of books didn’t arrive because the transporter had an off day. I truly had tears in my eyes (understatement). That tsunami of books can overwhelm me, too. Fortunately, I have a lot of help, and by Monday, we had everything shipped on time, just as promised. Then I collapsed.
But the very next day, I’d read another enthusiastic response or receive an email from someone sharing a personal story about how the book touched them. And then I remember what it’s all for.
It really is magic. What’s happening now is exactly what the book is about. How could it be otherwise? Creative power, surrender, not overthinking, and following your intuition. That’s how a reality emerges that you couldn’t have imagined in your wildest dreams.
Well then. I’m ready. Bring it on!
Let the magic begin!
